Thursday, October 13, 2016

Meragukan Kesaktian Tuhan

Semua temen gue tau kalo gue males ngomong tentang keimanan gue. Bukan soal agama gue loh, keimanan merupakan sesuatu yang terlalu pribadi untuk dibagi ke sembarang orang. Gue masih yakin kalo Yesus itu Tuhan, tapi yang mau gue omongin bukan itu. 

Di abad 21 ini gue jarang nemu orang beragama yang tersinggung karena agamanya diomongin. Karena gue emang ga berteman dengan mereka. Yang sering gue temukan adalah kami yang saling menghina, atau karena gue adalah pihak penyinggung, dan yang tersinggung bergeming tak mengurusi urusan duniawi layaknya martir syurga.

Sudah menjadi pandangan umum bahwa agama itu urusan masing-masing pribadi sama Tuhannya. Mau muja Yesus kek, Leonardo di Caprio kek, pohon kek, sama aja. Apapun kata gue mereka akan tetap menjadi Tuhan setidaknya buat lo, dan gue yakin kesaktian mereka ga bakal berubah karena perbuatan siapa-siapa. Mereka akan tetap sakti, apapun yang isi bumi katakan tentang mereka.

Gue rasa adalah buang-buang waktu untuk membela sesuatu yang 'abuden', yang absolut, dan entah berapa total waktu nasional yang dihabiskan analis-analis menanggapi bagaimana Ahok menghina ayat suci seakan-akan Tuhan adalah makhluk tidak berdaya yang tidak bisa membela dirinya. Jika Tuhan yang dulu bisa mematikan orang perkara tidak permisi sebelum kencing di hutan, apakah sekarang Dia sudah terlalu tua? Tuhan berubah, ataukah keyakinan kita yang berubah?

Bukankah Tuhan adalah Tuhan? Apa Tuhan itu Kitab (musti kapital)? Apakah Tuhan seketika hina? Apa kesaktian Tuhan seketika berkurang?
Kalau Tuhan bisa dibilang yang paling kita jaga dan kita sayang, bisa kita andaikan Tuhan sebagai pacar. Tuhan adalah kekasih hati bagi orang Kristen dan juga untuk Rumi, dan meski Ia dihina gue akan bilang: "Gapapa Tuhan, Tuhan tetep paling hebat buat aku." Kebanyakan sih gue diem, karena pacar yang itu terlalu secure dalam posisinya di hidup gue. Dia tahu Dia siapa.

Absolut adalah purna. Tak bercacat, dan tak akan tersentuh meski diserang apapun. Tuhan yang Esa, Tuhan yang Maha. Tak akan berkurang kasih, tak akan berkurang adil, dan takkan mengurangi jatah oksigen untuk orang2 yang menghina Dia.
Kristen dan Islam sama-sama agama monoteis, kita sama-sama percaya Tuhan yang satu. Yang kita percayai tetap sama dan tidak berubah. Ataukah memang Tuhannya agama kurang berdaya untuk mengejawantahkan amarahnya?


Monday, August 22, 2016

Nota di Tempelan Kulkas

kita berbagi hanya satu-dua kecup
hangat yang sementara itu cukup
patah hati masih bisa hidup
jangan sampai usia juga menutup

dan kukira,
tak akan ada esok lagi untuk kita
tapi semua akan baik-baik saja
yang itu tak kuterka

kata orang mati satu tumbuh seribu bukan?
tapi ya begitu
harus mati dulu.

Thursday, February 25, 2016

(In)Tangible.

What are words?
Words are some letters without space. It has some meaning to it. Some words has a single meaning, some has many. You use it to form a more complex meaning out of sentences.

What is action?
Action is the thing you do with an objective, or some. Sometimes you do it just because, but it also counts.

What are words for?
Eternalizing the past.
Dreaming the future.

What is action for?
You do it in hoping for some result in your head, don't you?

Are words meant to be let out?
I guess not everytime.

Is action better than words?
Maybe. A man of his words, they say.

But they say a stand up comedian who acts out is cheap!
Agree to disagree.

What shapes our history?
Action, clearly.

How do we know our history?
Words, distinctly.

Do you lie with action?
Try me.

Do you lie with words?
Duh.

Do you play with history?
Bear with it.

Are you playing with words?
Isn't it the most exciting thing in the world?

History doesn't shape itself without action.
But when words fail to execute, it never happened.

When you did something but no one knows, did it happen?

Did it?



2016.02.24, 1.49a.m -- kamar.

Friday, January 15, 2016

January 14th, 2016.

On the day I turned 23, I was terrified. A bunch of terrorist attacked Jakarta with multiple bombings and shootings.
Me and my team had to postpone our event out of this incident due to security issue though it was not an easy decision for us. It was tough. Felt like all the sleepless nights and hardwork goes to waste. I didn't envision a birthday like this.

F U, terrorist. For destroying my favorite Starbucks in the city. For every fallen victims. For everything.  I can't express how much I hate you with words and even Italian gestures.

But I'm glad everyone is safe. I thank God that all the people I love are safe. I'm thankful that I have great bosses, and an excellent team. Thank you very much for your calls, voice notes and presents. Thank you very much for showering me love I don't deserve.

Anyway stay safe, dear friends. Stay alert.

Friday, January 1, 2016

2015/6

It's the end of the year again. And looking back to my 2015's resolution, I did it well. In fact, 2015 was terrific. This was the year i gave no fuck to negativity.

Dreams. That's what I have for 2016. Growing up with overachievers all my life, people surround me are determined to go abroad for free. Be it a job, conference, student exchange, as long as you're in Europe, you've made it. Congrats.

I didn't make it. My scholarship got rejected and my heart crushed. But then came the thought, is it really the dream? Then what's next? Is it all? To land my feet in EU's land? I think if I got there then, now I'd be really confused to figure out my life. With a little working experience and a master degree, I'd be lucky to have a decent job that I like.

So what now? I'm wishing that 2016 will be the year, emphasize on "the". The year that dreams are made and fulfilled. That dreaming will keep my feet on the ground.
I'm wishing to meet more interesting people that will make the journey worthwhile. To go to new places, to not lose gut. And above all, I wish for love. The great love from above.